"The Principle
of Chaos and Reorganization."
By Bill Harris
In my opinion, all so-called dysfunctional feelings
and behaviors -- all those things that cause us emotional and
mental suffering and cause us to seek therapy, personal growth
programs, self-help approaches, and so on -- are really coping
mechanisms we use in an attempt to deal with the stress of being
pushed past our personal threshold for what we can handle coming
at us from the world. When our threshold is too low for our environment,
stress and chaos happen, and we exhibit these various ways of
suffering.
These coping mechanisms are an attempt to keep
our internal map of reality (which is really what is being stressed
when one's personal threshold is exceeded) from falling apart.
What we fail to recognize as we try to defend this map is that
after falling apart, a new and better map will take its place.
This natural process, the identification of which
led to a Nobel Prize for scientist Ilya Prigogine, involves this
map (our concept of who we are and what our relationship is to
the rest of the universe) going into temporary chaos in response
to too much input, finally falling apart (when the chaos becomes
so much the old map cannot hold itself together), and then instantly
and simultaneously reforming itself at a higher level that CAN
handle the environmental input that previously was too much for
it.
Unless the system completely ceases to exist
(the odds of which are one chance out of an infinite number of
situations), this reorganization always results in a new system/map
that can handle what the old system/map could not handle. The
only reason we try to protect the old system and keep it from
falling apart (and then reorganizing at a higher level) is that
we think that map is who we are, rather than just a handy conceptual
tool we use to help us through life. We get so used to using our
concept of reality when making decisions about what to do, how
to feel, how to act, and so on, that we forget it's just a tool
and that who we really are is much more.
Because we think we are this map, we think WE
are falling apart when the map begins to fall apart, and we then
try to protect it, even though the deficiencies of this map are
the real problem in the first place, and a new a better one will
instantly allow everything to work better.
So what is the practical application of this
model of how things change and why people create dysfunctional
feelings and behaviors and other kinds of resistance? How does
this work in real life?
I'm glad you asked. First of all, you have to
acknowledge to yourself that chaos precedes change. Whenever there
is chaos (or stress) in your life (I don't mean usually or occasionally,
I mean WHENEVER) it means your current map is not able to handle
the environment you're in, is not quite able to handle the journey
you're on at the moment. At this point you might remind yourself
that
- a new map would be nice right now, and would,
in fact, solve the problems the old map can't handle,
- chaos is a sign I'm getting ready to create
a new map, and if I get out of the way it's creation will happen
easier and faster.
It is helpful, therefore, to recognize when you
are in the initial chaos state, and to remind yourself that this
is the prelude to positive change -- if you know how to get out
of the way and let it happen. Many (most?) people cannot recognize
when they are in chaos. Why? Several reasons. Many people instantly
self-medicate whenever they begin to feel stressed. They reach
for a drink, a joint, a cigarette, food, a sexual partner, or
some kind of adrenaline rush -- anything to mask what they are
feeling. They do this unconsciously and automatically. They do
not realize that the chaos they feel is a growth opportunity and
that by not taking advantage of it they are condemning themselves
to repeat the stress and chaos over and over, since every time
life pushes at their current map, it will always be stressful.
A new and more highly evolved map, however, could handle what
the current map cannot.
Second, most people do not take responsibility
for the chaos or stress they feel. They project it onto something
outside of themselves. They find something to blame. "I'm
stressed because of him." "I'm stressed because I lost
my job." "I'm stressed because of the terrorist attacks."
"I'm stressed because of my kids/parents/partner/finances/health/whatever."
The real reason you are stressed, however, isn't any of these.
The one and only reason you are stressed or in chaos is that your
threshold for what you can handle is too low for the environment
you're currently in. And the one and only real solution is to
raise that threshold higher. Not taking responsibility and instead
blaming something outside of yourself is yet another way of going
unconscious and of avoiding being an active participant in creating
personal evolution.
So first, you have to notice that there is chaos.
"Here I am, in chaos." Then, you have to acknowledge
why it is happening. "My threshold for what I can handle
is too low." Then you have to remind yourself that since
chaos is the first step in reorganizing your map of reality at
a higher level -- one that will work much better than the old
one and handle much more -- this is actually a big opportunity.
"Hallelujah! I am about to evolve, and once I make the leap
to the next level, I'll be able to handle more, and a lot of things
that cause me to suffer now will fall away!" Then, you have
to let it be okay that you are going through the interim period
of chaos, and just watch what happens (more about that in a future
article). Resisting will at best make the process painful, and
at worst will keep the reorganization from happening at all.
Few people in the world really understand how
change works, which is why most people fight it. And, because
they often "win" this battle over the change trying
to happen, they lose the war. By fighting off change, you get
to be pushed past the same old low threshold over and over until
you finally allow it to reorganize itself at a higher level.
But you DO understand how change works, which
will save you untold suffering, if you will only take advantage
of your knowledge. Change is a natural process. You don't need
to know "how" to do it. The entire universe has been
evolving for God only knows how long by this very mechanism. All
you have to do is get out of the way. Here are the steps once
more:
- Notice and acknowledge that you are in chaos
or stress.
- Realize it is happening not because of something
outside of you (yes, there is a stimulus, but it is not the CAUSE)
but because your threshold for what you can handle is too low
to handle your current environment.
- Remind yourself that this is a good thing,
and means you are about to evolve to the next level, where many
current problems will disappear.
- Let it be okay that this is happening.
- Watch with curiosity and don't resist.
Isn't life simple?
Well, it is if you follow the above. Or, you
can avoid being in any situations where you get pushed past your
threshold (good luck). You can stay home, isolate yourself, do
your best to not participate in life, don't take in any new information,
etc. Or, you can develop all kinds of ways to blow off steam when
the pressure builds. You can be angry a lot, worry a lot, compulsively
talk, or exercise, or eat, or have sex (or whatever you like to
do). Of course, you'll continue to have the same threshold in
that case, with the same limitations. You already know what that's
like.
This principle of one of those deceptively simple
things in life. At first it seems difficult, but once you master
it you can't figure out why you ever did it any other way.
One of the great things about the Centerpointe
program (you knew I'd bring this in eventually, didn't you?) is
that not only does it push your threshold for what you can handle
higher and higher (and higher), but it also gives you the clarity
to be able to go through the five steps I've outlined above. As
people progress in the program, this process gets easier and easier.
If your life is anything like mine, you have
one opportunity after another to master this principle, so decide
right now you will master it. After all, you'll keep getting opportunities,
one after another, until you do.
Finally, if you're not in the program yet, what
are you waiting for? How long do you want to wait to get started
in making your life easier and your suffering smaller?
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